Since I have been getting negative results on my ovulation tests, I am starting to worry if I even ovulated ever since I got married. I do not have those crazy EWCM that other women claim to have when they O. I also have not gotten ANY positive results on my OPK. 😩

So this morning, I just tested for fun knowing that I should be O-ing tmr, I got 2 lines like finally?! Although the T line was way lighter than the C line, the  I was so excited still. I THOUGHT I WAS FINALLY OVULATING and I felt so happy but my happiness was short-lived. I went on to check the manuals that was included in the test kit but it says that a lighter T line is NOT A POSITIVE result. SIGHHHHHHHHHHHHH đŸ˜„

We are on the way to our 12th cycle and 2 months till our 1 year anniversary. I badly want to check but I doubt the doctors will willingly accept us knowing I have regular period and we have not tried for more than a year. I really hope ours will at least be a last minute thing – like exactly on the 12th cycle or 12th month of being married to each other.

This is depressing but I need. to. be. strong.

P/s: I have successfully avoided meeting the pregnant ladies/mummy friends the whole of October. I do not know how long more we can avoid them but I am not ready and they WILL NEVER understand. Our ties will be severed but I am just not ready. May Allah guide us to the right path.

September 2015

While some of my friends rejoice having their little bundle of joy, some losing sleep taking care of their newborns and some experiencing crazy 1st trimesters; here I am still going crazy trying to conceive. I don’t know if I have gone a little bit overboard with all the purchases below which was bought in a span of a few days! Hahaha.

We first bought the Blackmores Conceive Well Gold Pre-Conception pills. While I was crazy googling TTC and infertility, many TTC ladies bought this and got lucky.. Some within the first few months of trying so, I am praying the best for us too! I know this is not a miracle pill but I hope it helps to add on and help my body with the nutrients and vitamins it need to conceive.

A few days after buying my pre-conception pills, DH thought it would be good for him to start taking vitamins as well so we bought the Blackmores Men’s Performance Multi Vitamin. I am not really sure the success rate for this but no harm trying?

abc3About a few days later, I madly googled the success rate of the 2 pills above and found out that egg white mucus is also one of the more important factors in helping the sperms swim to right places. I read that many ladies without much mucus during ovulation tried Pre-Seed as a lubricant so…….. I bought it too -_-” DH seems to like it which is a bonus. It is a little bit troublesome (lol) but for a BFP, I would gladly try ANYTHING! & It is actually not bad lah. Also, a little goes a long way……..

abc2Last but not least, after learning that a friend found out there was a problem with her fallopian tubes ONLY after religiously charting and using OPKs, I kepo-ed to see if it will give me some kind of results too. Needless to say, I have “not” ovulated since the day I started using the Guardian Ovulation Test kit. Sigh. Please do not ask me how to chart or track daily mucus because I really have no idea! I do not even intend to learn this method in depth because I am very, very sure it will drive me even crazier. For now, I am just going to do a simple chart to see if my BBT changes (oh yes, I also bought a BBT thermometer!! Ugh!) till my next AF and next ovulation period and if it doesn’t, we will leave it all to Him. 😩

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Any readers out there who are TTC may wish to try one or all of the above if you haven’t done so. There are also others like Menevit, Elevit, mainly Folic Acid pills, etc that you may want to look into. From my crazy research, these are some of the more common, affordable and readily available ones in Singapore. Good luck! ❀