It’s been awhile since I posted and to be honest, there isn’t anything much to update because everything is still the same. After a year of trying, I have learnt to just overlook everything and not be affected by every single thing. I have also learnt to shut up about not having a child and about still not being able to conceive – all these to save myself from any further heartaches/unnecessary unsolicited advice.
DH and I have been coping quite well. To be honest, it is more like masking our real feelings by just keeping quiet about it. It is our fertile week and we are still trying – just not THAT aggressively. We pray everyday that this will be our special month but if isn’t, we will just move on and deal with it.
On cycle day 8, I noticed alot of clear stretchy mucus after pee-ing and I thought that could be the excess semen or leftover pre-seed being washed out from my V so I just let it slip. It occurred again the next day as we BD-ed on both nights so I just let it slip again.
We did not BD yesternight on cycle day 14 but I noticed the same clear stretchy mucus after pee-ing. I am not sure if this is a sign of ovulation because my ovulation pee stick indicated a negative (it is NEVER positive, though!) so, I am really unsure. Nevertheless, we usually BD alot during my fertile week just in case there is a fertilized egg somewhere and somehow I could get pregnant. We shall pray hard this month because this never happened to me before – this stretchy egg-white mucus thingy – so I am really praying hard this month. Who knows, right?
On the other hand, I am worried sick this is a start to many health issues.. What if this isn’t fertile mucus and a sign of something wrong happening inside of me. I am just so negative sometimes but you can’t blame me for this, can you? It’s been a year and if I was fertile enough, we wouldn’t have to wait THIS long. SIGH.
Whatever it is, we will not be expecting much. We know the drill.