twelve x.

This morning I found out that a friend of a friend is pregnant. So these 2 friends will be happily pregnant together and will be happy mummies having playdates etc in future. How fun.

& here I am feeling slightly miserable and depressed – almost at lost with what to do next. We are now in the midst of our 12th fertile week. I really do not know how else to convince myself that this is normal because feeling normal is the thing I feel the least right now. Why is it so hard for us? Why am I NOT normal? Why are my friends blessed in this aspect except me?

I remind myself time and again, Allah have perfect plans for all of us. I also remind myself how He is there during my other tough times; throughout family crisis, financial struggles and wedding/work woes. I also remind myself how blessed I am to even have a great spouse, life partner, soulmate & bestfriend. That in itself should be enough to prove that He has my best interest. Alhamdulillah. So, yes. I need to pick up strength to live my days positively; a day at a time.

12. 12 is our special number. I pray everyday this will be our lucky month.

Insha Allah. Insha Allah. Insha Allah.

P/s: Constantly thinking when will be a good time to call up KKH to make THE dreaded appointment. SIGH WHY 😦